Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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