omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Four minutes until I can fart!
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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