You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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