You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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