I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
How's work?
Spinning.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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