You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Come on in and take your pants off
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