he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
wow bdsm is so cute
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
