Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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