I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
