that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
