I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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