Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
As shirtless as possible
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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