But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
