did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
