He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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