so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
She bit a glass in half.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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