I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
