i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
