I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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