entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
