just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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