it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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