How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
This girl is more easily done than said...
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
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