Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
