Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
