it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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