So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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