I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
