so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Randomize
