whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
