8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
