Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i permit you to call me
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
