Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
We have so much sex to catch up on
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Randomize