I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
