Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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