Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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