When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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