Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
