so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
