hotel room ftw
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize
