just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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