are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
