1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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