some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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