Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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