PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
