RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Randomize
