Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
