at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
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