shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
