I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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